It has been one hell of a week. My sister's surgery was finally scheduled to happen Monday, except it didn't. The worst possible scenario playing out before my family; the reality of learning to live with a cracked and broken heart our new normal.
In the spirit of Susannah's post, the reality of life is that shitty things happen to good people. My sister's story is one that I couldn't make up if I tried and I'm not even talking about the very aggressive cancer. And while I'm a believer in the power of our thoughts becoming things, that I can and will manifest my destiny, that I'm on my path...I also know that all I get is right now.
I can paint a beautiful picture here of myself. I can show you my pretty photos and the new things I've added to my shop. I can speak of the beauty in the little things that happen in a day that make my life special; that slowing down and appreciating all that I have is an experience worth having.
All of this is true and yet it's just a glimpse, a half truth of what my life really is.
The down and dirty is that I'm scared shitless and I'm trying to pull on my big girl pants and be brave. I've learned that my super power has always been my ability to numb; that I can protect the most fragile parts of my heart and face the truth, (and fear), head on when I don't look too closely at that which is cracking me wide. (There's time for all of that later.)
And yet, I'm probably the most creatively prolific I've been in years, maybe even ever. Confronting the quagmire of my grief behind the glass encased inside my camera bag; documenting, creating, releasing.
