The word I chose for 2012 isn't my word. I've realized that it's more of an evocation than a motif and it started me down the path of speculation. Suddenly I found myself wondering about choosing a word for the year, calling bullshit on myself and doubting whether it had ever worked for me. I know that choosing words has worked for me, (especially last year), just like I know that the word I chose isn't my word for 2012.
I loved this post on this new-to-me blog, and in the comments someone mentioned a book, The Warrior of Light, and I thought about it all afternoon, about the image of a warrior of light. It resonated deeply, the idea of choosing a way you want to walk in the world, a way to help you define who you are, but it feels like someone else's idea and journey and this year, I really need to stand on my own.
Walking back from the beach Saturday morning, rambling around in my thoughts, my word popped into my head and it was so obviously the right word, I didn't need to think about it any longer. The word I need for 2012 is a word I find hard to use especially in description about myself. I dance away from the word, choosing to deflect and ignore what my heart so desperately wants to embrace.
This year my self-confidence and ability to use this word will be challenged. The word that wasn't my own this year, (glow), can act as a tool to guide me, just as walking in this world as a warrior of light will help me navigate the waters and take possession.
