dreaming

My dreams have been more vivid lately. It's what happens when you're experiencing a creative awakening, so they say. Which sounds much more dramatic than it really is; definitely more exciting written here, than the slow and steady peel under way. 

Last night I dreamt of my sister. We were driving around, it seems like we were doing errands. She was silent, and I knew it was because she was dead. It felt normal and comforting to have her there with me, even if I felt a little sad this morning afterwards. 

M mentioned that he thought she came to visit us when we first brought Howard home. There was one night in particular that Howard was barking and backing away from something only he could see just beyond us. 

It was three years ago March that we made the decision to leave the east for the west. Unbelievable to think of how our lives have changed in so many ways, from this place now, it seems we're exactly where we're supposed to be.

It seems ironic from where I stand, fairly uncertain of anything beyond my immediate world, and content to be in this place. As I meet myself in new ways, I know I'm looking for new definitions of what I will do with myself. 

Where is my place? 
What do I want my contribution to be?